Could we find an element that has different numbers of electronic and nuclear charges...?
Certainly we could find the ION of an element......
Of course elements are uniformly neutral; they have equal numbers of protons, and electrons. In their compounds, we assume that they exchange electrons between themselves to form ions and complexes, and the electronic distribution reflects their position on the Periodic Table, which you don't want to use..........
In general, metals are REDUCING species; they are formally conceived to donate electrons to give metallic compounds. On the other hand, non-metals (from the RIGHT of the Periodic Table as we face it) are OXIDIZING species); they accept electrons to give formal negative ions in their compounds and complexes. Do oxygen and fluorine fit this description?
There is not much more I can say. If there is a specific issue or question, ask again, and someone will help you.